Love of my life! My horror life, that is.

I'd like to take a moment and introduce you to a great love of mine. Once upon a time, before I got knocked up in high school, after I went to England and became a Punk Rocker and hung out at Picadilly Circus, and after I became a Solid Gold Dancer and made-out with Andy Gibb, I was going to marry this beautiful man.

He had everything! Tall, dark and handsome, as charming as a prince, smart as..........well, something very smart, and funny as all-get-out!! Oh how I loved this man! Let's face it, I still do.

Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Joe Bob Briggs!

Amity V, Almost there kids!

Just one more to go! I'm sorry if I've bored you with my "house of horror" fascination, it's who I am.

Wait till I get a baby and ramble on about that!

Part IV of the Real Amityville Horror

I loves me them Warrens'!

Real scary stuff III! And the fact that I have eatin 5 peanut butter cups!

I went to Wally World, not the "Vacation" Wally World, but Walmart, and bought candy for the candy container at out shop. By candy container, I mean gallon size holder of sweet treats. Which also means we get lots of visitors, just stoppin by, saying "howdy" to the nuggets and poking through the selection of goodies. The chocolate ones are the first to go. So needless to say, I didn't want all the dirty, smelly, car fixers and delivery guys eatin all the heart shaped peanut butter cups before I had any for myself! It's every man for himself around here!

Now back to the horror!



Quinton Tarrintino once compaired horror movies to Reese's peanut butter cups. Boobs and gore, two great tastes that taste great together!

Amen!

Part II of Real Scary Stuff!

This is a six part series, my dear friends. I know it's a lot to commit to, but it's well worth it! There's pictures of dead bodies and ghoasties and supernatural phenomenon. It's my happenin baby, and it freaks me out!!

Please to continue.....



Once again I'd like to mention that I did this all by myself! I ROCK!!

Real scary stuff!

I've been checking out some cool things on YouTube, and I found this! It's a documentary on "The Real Amityville Horror". If you know anything about me, you know how much I LOVE scary stuff!! I don't just love horror, I LOVE HORROR!

Please to enjoy!



Look Kate, I did it all by myself and I didn't even cry!!

My big, fat, exciting news!

No, I'm not attempting another diet, at least not in blogland.

Our big, fat, exciting news is that we are adopting a baby!!


This is actually been in the works for some time now, but we weren't really ready to share with the world. First of all, adoption is quite a process! I have been filling out paper work, getting numerous background checks, referrals from everyone but the pope (by the way, does anyone know his e-mail? His would be golden!), fingerprinting and verbal "whatever's" from my man-babies! Sheesh! All I want is a baby, not be president of the United States!!

Secondly, you would be surprised how many people judge you. I can't tell you how many people have asked, "Why would you do that?? Your children are already grown!" Yes, believe me, I know. I have wondered that same question myself. Why would a 40 year old woman with grown children want to start all over again raising a family?? Because, it's AWESOME!! Yes, there are nights of no sleep, and pooping and puking, tantrums in the middle of Wal-mart, and peeing your pants cuz your mom won't come in the potty with you cuz she is eating dinner (hee, hee Garrett!), and countless other reasons that mothers with young children toss at me after they hear our good news! Those words make me stop and question, "Am I making the right decision?"

I say, "YES!" I know how much work it is, but I know how rewarding it is, too! And this time I have more experience, more life under my belt. This baby won't be my "experimental" child! Lucky baby!

HP is super excited cuz he doesn't have any babies. It will be so fun to see him love a little person more than he loves his car/truck/motorcycle/shop/boat! Men are funny like that!

Bonus, I don't have to be pregnant and in high school! Which is cool all on it's own!

So, I will be filling you in on our journey into parenthood, again for some of us. I'm totally scared and I'm really excited!

Cute Mommy Graphics and Layouts

This one is for Abe!

I am dedicating this posting to Abe, because darling sister told me that Abe says I never post anymore! I don't know if I should quote that, or if it's just hear-say, but either way, she is correct. I never post anymore!

I'd like to blame my three jobs, or my addiction to "CrackBook", but really.....I think I just ran out of things to say. Not that things weren't happening in my life, just... ya know......life. I wish I was clever like PW or could post pictures without crying, because computers are like math and I just really don't get them and their technology crap! My lovely sister does this every day, without the tears and drama, mind you! And she can do math!!

My pretty friend Abe (with the gorgeous red hair that I want to cut off and wear as my own!), has cute lil links and recipes and stuff! All I have is typing, boring, boring typing.

My New Year's resolution is to be a better blogger. I think I would like it better if I could just come in once a day and fix my blog's hair, put on cute new outfits and make it look pretty! Like Blogger Barbie!! Wouldn't that be fun?!!

So, this year will be better! Pictures and all!

I promise, Abe.

I always wondered this too!

There is one Christmas Carol that has always baffled me.
What in the world do leaping lords, French hens,
swimming swans, and especially the partridge who won't come out
of the pear tree have to do with Christmas?


This week, I found out.

From 1558 until 1829, Roman Catholics in England were
not permitted to practice their faith openly. Someone
during that era wrote this carol as a catechism song for young Catholics.
It has two levels of meaning: the surface meaning
plus a hidden meaning known only to members of their church. Each
element in the carol has a code word for a religious reality
which the children could remember.


-The partridge in a pear tree was Jesus Christ.

-Two turtle doves were the Old and New Testaments.

-Three French hens stood for faith, hope and love.

-The four calling birds were the four gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke & John.

-The five golden rings recalled the Torah or Law, the first five books of the Old Testament.

-The six geese a-laying stood for the six days of creation.

-Seven swans a-swimming represented the sevenfold gifts of the Holy Spirit--Prophesy, Serving, Teaching, Exhortation, Contribution, Leadership, and Mercy.

-The eight maids a-milking were the eight beatitudes.

-Nine ladies dancing were the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit--Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self Control.

-The ten lords a-leaping were the ten commandments.

-The eleven pipers piping stood for the eleven faithful disciples.

-The twelve drummers drumming symbolized the twelve points of belief in the Apostles' Creed.

So there is your history for today. This knowledge was shared with me and I found it interesting and enlightening and now I know how that strange song became a Christmas Carol...so pass it on if you wish.'

Merry (Twelve Days of) Christmas Everyone

Feels Like Christmas to Me!

Free Comments and Graphics


If this doesn't say Christmas.........then I don't know what does.

HMO's and the Economy

TOP TEN INDICATORS THAT YOUR EMPLOYER HAS CHANGED TO A CHEAPER HEALTH CARE PLAN:

(10) Your annual breast exam is done at Hooters.

(9) Directions to your doctor's office include "Take a left when you enter the trailer park."

(8) The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles

(7) The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.

(6) The only item listed under Preventative Care Coverage is "an apple a day."

(5) Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month.

(4) "The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges," is not a typographical error.

(3) The only expense covered 100% is "embalming."

(2) Your Prozac comes in different colors with little M's on them.

AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOU'VE JOINED A VERY CHEAP HEALTH CARE PLAN:
(1) You ask for Viagra, and they give you a Popsicle stick and duct tape!


MySpace Graphics & MySpace Layouts

Turkey Day!

Thanksgiving!

Just think
If the indians had givin the Pilgrims
a donkey instead of a turkey,
we would all be having a piece of ass for Thanksgiving.

Have a great holiday!



Free Comments and Graphics

Facebook Junky!

I am a Facebook junky. I may need an intervention. A twelve step program. Detox. I LOVE IT!!! Thank you dear sister, Abe, Dammit Janice!, Miss Carrie and all my other friends that have turned me on to such glorious wonders as "Food Fling" and "Mafia Wars", and "Scavenger Hunt". What would I do without you all day?

Work.

Nuthin spooky today, kiddies. It'ull be ok.

This post is not about haunting's or scariness. Surprise!! This is just letting you know about my fav-o-rite music to listen to while I'm at work. And it's free!! I love that!

You can find the link between Pennywise the Clown and Friday the 13th's, Jason. Totally appropriate placement. It's the oooy gooy middle of a horror love sandwich.

I always go for the 80's, but they have different options for you to chose from.

But why would you wanna do that?

Class of '86 rules!!


Comments

Scare your pants off......at home preferably.

So my Ghoul-friends, With Halloween just around the corner, I've been watchin lots of horror programing on my beloved television. It's a month long of delicious, scary shows to waste my time away! Here is a rundown of some of the horror-fest I've been spying.

IFC has been showing lots of cheesy, early 80's horror movies in the wee hours of the morning. Thank goodness we have a DVR!

Sci-Fi channel has the 31 days of Halloween. That means the whole month is dedicated to the dark holiday! My fav-o-rite show is Ghost Hunters. On Halloween they "go live" to hunt 'em some ghosties! Last year they went to the Stanley Hotel. To be honest with you, I watch it every week. I have a sickness.

The Travel Channel is awesome. They are showing a steady stream of haunted destinations and scariest places on earth. On Friday they are starting on new show called "Ghost Adventures". I have the original recorded and I have one word for you you, FREAKY!!!

Fox Family and Disney have some cute, family friendly, mildly scary programs on. Goosebumps and other fun things you can watch with the kids. My babies aren't at home, but sometimes I watch them anyway.

I'm also going to give you MY Top Ten Favorite Horror Movie List. Trust me, this is what I do.

10. The House on Haunted Hill -not the Vincent Price version. This movie has a lame ass kinda ending, but the rest of the movie kinda makes up for that. I liken it to 13 Ghosts. Same thing.

9. Friday the 13th parts 2 and 3 - I put these two together cuz they are both equal in my book. I watched part 2 with my best good friend Nissa when she left the big city to come down to the country for a visit. We were on the fold out in the living room watchin away when my evil brother Beau Baby jumped through the open window and scared the poop out of us! Part three is in 3-D so it's extra awesome! Both are good frighting memories.

8. The Evil Dead II - The Evil Dead is pretty good, but I think 2 is better! You don't have to watch the first one to watch the second one, cuz it does a lil recap in the beginning. Let me tell you, there is this scene with a deer head......Whoa! This is crazy stuff. Thank you Bruce Campbell. I want to have your babies. If I still could have babies.

7. The Amityville Horror - both versions. The original is so dark and unexpectedly terrifying. The remake has Ryan Reynolds in it, so what's not to love?! He doesn't wear a shirt in a few scenes, which is distracting from the horror. Ask Kate. He's so hot, it's frighting! A totally excellent re-make all-in-all.

6. A Nightmare on Elem Street - I was preggers with my first baby when I saw this movie. I'm still quite surprised he wasn't born right then and there! This movie seemed so real, like it could happen. The rest of the Elem Street movies turned into the Freddy Freak Show, but this one still has it's street cred. I sound so gangsta!

5. An American Werewolf in London - I love, love, love, wait one more, love this movie!!!!! If I'm feeling bad, sad or mad, I just play me some "Werewolf". Yep, it's like a happy pill wrapped in delightful, Wonka-like coating! It's dark and it's funny! It's Brits and Werewolves! It's two great tastes that taste great together! I especially love the scene when Griffin Dunn (cute!) and David Naughton (cuter!) are walking on the Moores. Ahhhhhhhhhh, feels like home to me.

4. The Entity - This movie is based on a true story. If you haven't seen it, you should. Barbara Hershey is excellent!

3. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre - Ok, both are so wonderful and each have their creepy elements, but if you can make it through the first half hour of the original, which is a slow set up, the rest is some crazy shizzzz!! When Leatherface opens that door and grabs the girl, it happens so fast and it's so terrifying, you don't even know what you just saw. I'm quite certain that I peed my pants.

2. The Haunting - Not the craptacular re-make, the real 1963 version. My love of horror movies comes from my mom. She's not crazy like me, but her eyes would light up when she would tell me about a particularly good one! She has a really good story about this movie, which I will save for another day. This movie is rated G and there are no special effects, but it's what you don't see that makes this movie so scary. Tasty trivia, this movie is in Stephen Kings Top 10 as well. Now that's gotta say something.

1. The Exorcist - This movie scares the shit out of me!! For real! I remember asking my home-ec teacher Mrs. Sorenson about it when I was in 7th grade, and she told me that people were vomiting and passing out in the theater! The thought of that alone terrified me. I watched it one night with my best good friend Michelle and I was so frightened that I made her sleep in my twin bed with me. The weird thing was that she laughed through the whole thing and thought it was dumb. I guess horror is subjective.

So there you have it! Some fine television and movies to get your scare on. If you differ or have any other movies I should add, please leave a dark comment.

Remember, in Bloggland no one can hear you scream.



Horror Pictures at satanspace.com
Look, it's Cute and Cuter!

Top 10 Reasons Trick or Treating is Better Than Sex

10) You are guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack.

9) If you get tired, you can wait ten minutes and go at it again.

8) The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some.

7) You don’t have to compliment the person who gives you some.

6) It’s ok that the person you’re with fantasizes you’re someone else, because you are.

5) Twenty years from now you’ll still enjoy candy.

4) If you don’t like what you get, you can always go next door.

3) It doesn’t matter if kids hear you moaning and groaning.

2) Less guilt the morning after.

1) You can do the whole neighborhood.

Horror Pictures at satanspace.com

My baby is 22! Now that's scary!

Good Morning Shoppers! As you can see, I haven't been in Blogland as of lately. Do to our country's lack of moo-la, I've taken on several new and exciting employment opportunities! Really, I just needed the money. I've seen many a television movie of the week with some poor college co-ed making the same statement. Fortunately, I haven't had to resort to bein "Trudy the Daytime Hooker". The cash influx would be minimal at best, what with my cellulite and droopy double d's. Life ain't what it used to be, kids.

Nope, I got me a few jobs to add to my Cadillac Ranch duties! Now I'm spendin my Wednesdays being a Berista serving coffee and sandwiches to hungry contractors and heavy equipment operators. Waitress sounds so minimum wage. And on Thursdays, I work for my darling sis-in-law Laurie,(she married Beau Baby, poor girl!) running errands and buying things for the office. I'm calling that job "Personal Shopper", which sounds fancier than "Doin the stuff no one else wants or has time to do job". It's all in the title, my friends. Like gaffer, now one knows what that is, but it sounds cool and they get listed in the credits. How freakin awesome is that?!

Anyway, my point is that I'm only at the shop one or two days a week, so it's harder for me to keep in touch. I'm not neglecting you all. I promise. Also, I'm not poor, just earning some extra cash for the holidays. I'll let you know if I've had to change my name to Trudy.

Today is the birthday of my youngest man-baby, The Angry Youth. He turns 22. Gasp! I know, I can't believe it either. Seems like just yesterday I was screaming, "I just want this baby out of me!!!!!!" Ahhhhh, the memories. I hope your date last night went well, Baby, and I hope your birthday is happy! I love you more than there are words!




I don't know what the hell this is, but it's pretty fightening!

I love Halloween sooo much, it's CRAZY!

As you all know by now, Halloween is my favorite holiday. I'm devoting my blog space to all things scary in the month of October! I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE IT!!!!

So please enjoy my month of dark, whacky fun! I can't wait to share!

Ahhhhhh, live television.

Gotta love sticking your foot in your mouth!

Here are comments made by NBC sports commentators during the Summer Olympics that they
would like to take back:

1. Weightlifting commentator: 'This is Gregoriava from
Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up
and it was amazing.

2. Dressage commentator: 'This is really a lovely horse and
I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her
mother.

3. Paul Hamm, Gymnast: 'I owe a lot to my parents,
especially my mother and father.

4. Boxing Analyst: 'Sure there have been injuries, and even
some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that
serious.

5. Softball announcer: 'If history repeats itself, I should
think we can expect the same thing again.

6. Basketball analyst: 'He dribbles a lot and the
opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all
over their faces.

7. At the rowing medal ceremony: 'Ah, isn't that nice, the
wife of the IOC president is hugging the cox of the
British crew.

8. Soccer commentator: 'Julian Dicks is everywhere.
It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field.

9. Tennis commentator: 'One of the reasons Andy is playing
so well is that, before the final round, his wife takes
out his balls and kisses them... Oh my God, what have I
just said?'

Church Wars