Hello my pretties! I'm feeling optimistic today, considering the events of the morning. Nothing earth shattering, just mildly aweful. It was just another day.............
I woke up this morning, tired....again! Told Mr. Horsepower to go ahead without me cuz I was feeling a lil late this morning. You know that feeling, right?? So after he left I got out of bed, pulled down the one pant leg that had wiggled itself to the upper thigh area, tucked in my right boob that had escaped my shelf bra, tank top and headed straight to the kitchen for a very large cup of coffee. Ahhhhhhh........one sip and I feel brandly new! Came back to the bedroom to check on the devil hounds, much mischief can occur in the short amout of time that it takes to get a cup o joe. Still sleeping! This is shaping up to be a great day! Now to survey the damage that has ensued during the nights journey that has caused unleasing of boobies and riding up of pants. Ohhhh mirror, please be kind to me! Truth is, I should know better.
For those of you that do not know, I had an unfortunate accident with a unkown hairdresser. Said hairdresser gave me a "do" commenly known as "The Mrs. Brady". Yes, THE Mrs. Carol Brady from the Brady Bunch! Needless to say, that was very very far away from the look that I was going for. After a few (3) days of crying and kicking and tantruming like a 2 year old, Mr. Horsepower said, "Go get some dang hair extensions if it will shut you up for five dang seconds!" It didn't really sound like that, but it probably should have. So I called up my favorite hair extension gal to make an appoinment. Problems solved! Or not. Favorite hairdresser gal just so happens to be having a baby..........like she is literally in the hospital as we are speaking! Dang it!! Come on baby, I'm in a hair crisis! Why do you have to be born now when I am distraught?! Favorite hair gal says to see some other hair gal and get hair extensions. So I do. After spending my man-babies college education money, I have beautiful, long, blonde hair. And I feel happy again. And let's face it people, if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.
Today after looking in the mirror, I wasn't so happy. My beautiful blonde locks had morfed into a big ball of hair! First I tried combing it, no go. Then I thought I'll get into the shower and wash it and put on tons of Bio-Silk and that should do the trick! I'm smarter than the average bear. After fourty five minutes of trying to detangle the rat's nest attached to my head, I gave up. I went and got my trusty seam ripper and ripped those sucker out! And three hours later, I have shortish, thin hair again. It doesn't look like Mrs. Brady anymore, so that is good, and my hands kept moving fast so no rats could make a lodging on top of my skull. Also good.
I have and appointment with Favorite hair gal tomarrow. Would someone like to buy a devil hound? I need some cash, fast!
PS. My lil brother Beau Baby is now the proud owner of a grand baby! I'm soooooo glad it's you! Just kidding, I wish it was me, but since my man-babies can't remember anything unless the X-box loads it up onto the TV screen, it is for the best. Hope the lil one knows what family he got himself into?! Crazy is the standard, so it's best to keep up. Don't worry little one, your feet won't touch the ground and hugs are sure to be followed with kisses! Welcome home, baby!
I woke up this morning, tired....again! Told Mr. Horsepower to go ahead without me cuz I was feeling a lil late this morning. You know that feeling, right?? So after he left I got out of bed, pulled down the one pant leg that had wiggled itself to the upper thigh area, tucked in my right boob that had escaped my shelf bra, tank top and headed straight to the kitchen for a very large cup of coffee. Ahhhhhhh........one sip and I feel brandly new! Came back to the bedroom to check on the devil hounds, much mischief can occur in the short amout of time that it takes to get a cup o joe. Still sleeping! This is shaping up to be a great day! Now to survey the damage that has ensued during the nights journey that has caused unleasing of boobies and riding up of pants. Ohhhh mirror, please be kind to me! Truth is, I should know better.
For those of you that do not know, I had an unfortunate accident with a unkown hairdresser. Said hairdresser gave me a "do" commenly known as "The Mrs. Brady". Yes, THE Mrs. Carol Brady from the Brady Bunch! Needless to say, that was very very far away from the look that I was going for. After a few (3) days of crying and kicking and tantruming like a 2 year old, Mr. Horsepower said, "Go get some dang hair extensions if it will shut you up for five dang seconds!" It didn't really sound like that, but it probably should have. So I called up my favorite hair extension gal to make an appoinment. Problems solved! Or not. Favorite hairdresser gal just so happens to be having a baby..........like she is literally in the hospital as we are speaking! Dang it!! Come on baby, I'm in a hair crisis! Why do you have to be born now when I am distraught?! Favorite hair gal says to see some other hair gal and get hair extensions. So I do. After spending my man-babies college education money, I have beautiful, long, blonde hair. And I feel happy again. And let's face it people, if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.
Today after looking in the mirror, I wasn't so happy. My beautiful blonde locks had morfed into a big ball of hair! First I tried combing it, no go. Then I thought I'll get into the shower and wash it and put on tons of Bio-Silk and that should do the trick! I'm smarter than the average bear. After fourty five minutes of trying to detangle the rat's nest attached to my head, I gave up. I went and got my trusty seam ripper and ripped those sucker out! And three hours later, I have shortish, thin hair again. It doesn't look like Mrs. Brady anymore, so that is good, and my hands kept moving fast so no rats could make a lodging on top of my skull. Also good.
I have and appointment with Favorite hair gal tomarrow. Would someone like to buy a devil hound? I need some cash, fast!
PS. My lil brother Beau Baby is now the proud owner of a grand baby! I'm soooooo glad it's you! Just kidding, I wish it was me, but since my man-babies can't remember anything unless the X-box loads it up onto the TV screen, it is for the best. Hope the lil one knows what family he got himself into?! Crazy is the standard, so it's best to keep up. Don't worry little one, your feet won't touch the ground and hugs are sure to be followed with kisses! Welcome home, baby!
3 comments:
Jesus Christ, woman. Mom is going to FLIP when she hears you ripped out your extension. Or sees it, whichever comes first. :-)
Yes, that baby will be loved muchly by this crazy-ass family of ours. And he's gonna love every minute of it!
Pictures, pictures, we want pictures. Before...during...after...
And congratulations aunty!
That did get my attention! Congratulations on being a Great Auntie....like I told your lil sis you don't have to add the "Great" unless it is an adjective! I agree with Janice......send pics...I'd love to see your short non-Carol Brady hair!
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